I'd like our guests leaving our wedding to turn and say to each other something along the lines of, "Dang that was FUN! and her dress was [or she looked] amazing!" (amazing in a good way).
With that goal and the type of people we are in mind, we've set out to create a non-traditional take on this traditional event without going crazy or breaking the bank.
The invite list is 140, which if 80% attend, is 112 guests. So, it's a challenge with any sort of reasonable budget for a Philly Center City wedding.
Admittedly, the budget part was made a tad bit trickier when I fell in love with (and my loving partner agreed to) a venue that was out of our original budget. BUT, it IS amazing! I'm super stoked.
Place, food, & alcohol are the main ticket items. Those we are not compromising on. We want the food&drink to be 1) delicious and 2) plentiful.
There are, however, many things i am willing to give up or compromise on that are usually part of a traditional wedding. Reasons are not only monetary, but the overall goal and tone of the reception/wedding/party dictates a more laid back approach.
We've been together for 10 years and own a house, so we already consider ourselves committed to each other for life. This wedding reception is really all about celebrating with everyone.
We've also decided to pull it all off in three months from The day we decided to get hitched legally it to the day of the reception (which in wedding time, is akin to deciding to host Thanksgiving the Monday beforehand).
So, here's my "can be cut" list:
1. Officiant - Pennsylvania actually allows for you to marry yourselves (thank you Quakers!) which is more in keeping with our personal beliefs anyways.
2. Traditional Ceremony - For us, this part is really just about the two of us. We may do a small ceremony another night before the big reception just for immediate family. This will maximize social & party time at the reception/party. Plus, you don't have the costs of a church, unity candle, choir/soloist, tipping the servers, etc., etc.
3. Being walked down the aisle and/or bride entrance - I guess this seems redundant from number 2, but I thought I'd explain. I don't belong to my parents (anymore) for them to give me away. I also want for us to greet our guests as they arrive. A friend did this at her wedding and I loved it. It will set the tone for the wedding and we'll also get to say hello to everyone right away.
4. "First Look" - I want to look like myself, just on a great hair & face day & with a great dress on. I also don't want to spend 3+ hours of the day apart from my groom. It is okay if we get ready in our house together. I want to spend the day together :)
5. Groom's Attire - I want him to be comfy and feel good. I'm not about to pick out his clothing for him. Plus, he has style. He is also allowed to look like himself (!), just a little dressed up. We aren't the kind of people that wear tuxes or suits all the time.
7. Invitations - originally, I wanted to send an e-vite only. It is environmentally friendly, cost effective, and fast. A friend did this for his reception and it was fine. However, we have quite a long list and there are some folks who don't use email (really!). So, we've compromised. We opted for postcards which ask for folks to RSVP via phone or email. Postcards = less postage + less waste. Plus, I designed/drew them myself, so I didn't pay for design fees.
8. Engagement Pictures - well, we weren't really engaged. We're just gonna get married. I guess that means we're engaged, but it just feels like us as it always has. We have pictures from our 10 years together that we really like (such as vacation photos from around the world) and they'll be lots of pictures from the wedding.
9. Wedding Photographer - staged photos are not really us. Ridiculous photos - yes, but spending an hour before the reception taking pictures outside, not so much. Wedding photos always look like wedding photos. They are great, but not necessary for us. We will crowd source our photos with a # for instagram/twitter & have created a shared Flickr so everyone can upload/download each other's photos.
10. Rehearsal Dinner - with the chance that so many folks'll be in from out of town, why would I want to not see them? We'll play the day as it goes. We will [and by "we" I mean the ladies will] decorate during the day and see who's around for dinner all together. It's also an added expense that is not necessary. It'll be just as fun to be at home with everyone gathered around.
11. Real Flowers - this may change as I suddenly have a hook-up here, but they are also not environmentally friendly and they just die. I am somewhat conflicted about flowers. If we are not having a traditional ceremony, a bouquet seems silly. Maybe I will compromise on the table centerpieces. We'll see.
12. DJ - SPOTIFY, baby. One list for dinner, one for dancing. Boom. Plus, we can curate the list, so it's amazing. Yep.
13. Bridal Party - It's not necessary since there will not be a traditional ceremony or shower. Plus, I've just saved all the ladies I'm closest to $1000 each. AND they get to wear whatever they want.
14. Bridal Shower - We have so many household and decorative items, we could have a reverse-shower! Ha! That's not a bad idea actually...
15. Toasts - We know our families love us. We know we're fabulous. Let's all just hug it out and celebrate. No need for someone super close to us to be nervous all night until their speech.
16. Engagement Ring - I'm a practical gal. I'd rather spend it on the house or a vacation. Also, I'm supposed to inherit some diamonds (don't worry, I'm not waiting on someone to die). If I do, I may have a ring set. We will probably get wedding bands, although maybe not right away.
17. Honeymoon Right Away - This may have to wait a bit or we may do a mini-moon.
18. New Shoes - I already have so many fantastic pairs. I already know what I'm wearing. PLUS, I can dance all night without blisters. AND, they're blue :)
19. Hair/Make-up - again, I want to look like me. Plus, I know what I like. Although, I may have to pick up a new shade of lipstick...
20. New Jewelry - I was gifted with some heirloom pearls - a bracelet & earrings. I will def wear the bracelet, earrings and other jewelry will depend on how the dress turns out. I have my mom's prom necklace that I may wear as well. It is Audrey-esq-classy and sparkly.
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That cuts out some things. I am also somewhat crafty (she's crafty!), so I'm planning on some DIY:
Tablecloths (almost done, actually)
Decorations (started)
Centerpieces
Favors
Dress (have the fabric, haven't started yet, still have 2 months...)
Photobooth! (although, we may purchase a new camera for this, but then we'd have a new camera)
Cake Topper (started)
I'm looking forward to a great party! I'll let you know how it turns out.
