Employment & Creativity

It must be amazing if you don't have to work ever.  Imagine having money to do your everyday things (rent, food, clothes) plus art supplies/house stuff with a little left over for a vacation each year and donating.

I recently read Junky (or Junkie depending on the edition) by Burroughs (excellent, I thought). Here was a guy who had an allowance which allowed him to either not work, work occasionally, or work to support his habit.  Even so, it was years before he got it together to publish Junky, sending installations to friends who helped him get it all together for publication.  Granted, he was not as...focused as he could have been, but it just goes to show how distracting life can be (and makes me feel slightly better about not having something 100% finished from my time off).

Now that I'm working again (more on that later), I see how life truly gets in the way.  I'm not sure if this is how it is for everyone (I expect so).  It's bloody hard to minimize distractions. 

Now that I'm working again, I also get mentally tired from learning, thinking, problem-solving all day (hopefully, work affords the opportunity to learn, think, and problem-solve too).  AND between getting ready, the commute, and my work day, there isn't much left time over (leaving all health issues aside for now...).  Dinner and a minute to chat with S and that's about it.  I'm trying to train myself to get up early to write, but it's only been one week and I'm still adjusting.

I did get up at 5 am today though on my own (yes!) and then I had a work from home day (yes!) so I also saved the getting ready and commuting times.  It was a good morning for writing.

BUT, I'm hopeful that once I adjust, I'll be more productive.  There were also 3 evening work events last week, so that was a factor too.

I've set myself some general goals and I'm hoping I can stay on track.  They are attainable, so I'm hopeful!

.................................

And now about going back to work...

All that time off...

(Keeping time, time, time,

In a sort of Runic rhyme...)

All my persnicketiness about which jobs I'd even apply to...

All the countless hours applying to those could-be-perfect openings...

All those terrrrrrrible interviews...

And now...

And now.

What do I think?

I think it's only the first week.

(too early to tell)

BUT

I'm pretty confident I'm gonna love working here.

The mission of ARTWELL is so closely aligned with my own personal goals and mission that I find just being there exciting.  The staff is amazing (I know it's only a week in, but seriously).  I hope I am there a long time and make a meaningful contribution to the organization and through ArtWell, my community.

And if you have to give up making art & writing all day, the best way to do it is to support the arts and better my community while working with great folks.  So, I'm alright with working for now. I've had my [f]unemployment time to be off and find something (else) I love (writing!), but now it's time to return to reality.  Alas!  I was not born a countess.

Evaporating Time

The last year has flown by.  Dang.  It's been amazing.

It seems like one year off from full time work would be enough time to write The Great American Novel, create an amazing body of artwork, visit everyone, and re-do my entire house.

But here's the truth:

Time has a way of evaporating.

There are still the realities of your everyday (dishes, laundry, dinner, etc.) paired with not having an income and being careful about spending (hello art supplies! hello travel!).  If you have a partner in this life, you want to make them a priority as well.  And honestly, I love to read, so...

PLUS, I'm the type of person who thinks, "I should use this time to [insert huge OTHER project]." READ: getting married in 3 months with a DIY party for 100 people.

On top of all of this, I started looking for a job months out from when I really wanted to start.

It is really a job in and of itself to get a job.

So, what was left was time fairly well spent (see earlier post about what I've accomplished).

If I had to do it again, I'd not have thrown the wedding (just gotten married & maybe done a great honeymoon).  The party was great fun, but it did consume 3 months of my time off which could have been spent on art / writing.

AND LISTEN...

I'm under no illusions - taking a year off is pretty selfish - especially if you have a partner.  Even paying for myself (I'm an independent woman!) doesn't mean that it's not selfish.  I mean, you end up putting not just your, but BOTH of your lives pretty "on hold" until you figure out what your new job and what your new life will look like.  

It has felt like a pampering.  I feel refreshed.  I feel creative.  I feel inspired.
I feel HOPEFUL.

I'm very lucky.

To top it off?  I found an amazing organization to work at!  So, all in all, mostly a success.